Intimacy can be found in almost every relationship. A common misconception is that intimacy equates to romance or sexual feelings.
Intimacy is defined as “close familiarity or friendship; closeness.”
Intimacy is found in various relationships and is not limited to romantic or sexual intentions.
Whether it’s your partner, parent, friend, or colleague, intimacy can exist in just about every healthy relationship you have in your life. However, the types of intimacy, and actions you take to promote the intimacy, will look differently depending on the relationship.
Intimacy can be easier than you think: The simple act of sending someone a song or video clip that made you think of them can be a form of intimacy.

Emotional Intimacy
Besides physical intimacy, emotional intimacy is the most common form of intimacy that people think of. Emotional intimacy involves the feelings of acceptance, understanding, respect, trust, and the ability to be vulnerable, communicate openly, and share thoughts, feelings, and desires.
Effective communication is a crucial aspect of emotional intimacy as it allows individuals to express themselves and convey their emotions, desires, and needs. Emotional intimacy may also look like expressing genuine encouragement, reassurance, and compassion; it involves being open and honest about our thoughts and feelings about the other person and the relationship.
Vulnerability
The act of being vulnerable is to allow yourself to be seen on a deeper level by sharing our thoughts, feelings, dreams, hopes, fears, and disappointments – some may say that this is the pinnacle of emotional intimacy. It is the ability to share your past and current positive and negative experiences, express your needs and wants, and feel safe in doing so. The mutual vulnerability that can be experienced strengthens the emotional bond and intimacy that hold relationships together.
Vulnerability also establishes a profound sense of trust within relationships.
Trust
The ability to communicate effectively, be vulnerable, and provide forms of emotional intimacy builds trust within relationships.
Trust is a crucial element in any healthy relationship. Trust allows a stronger bond by strengthening the emotional intimacy of the relationship and allows you to hold accountability amongst each other. It is challenging to promote intimacy with someone that you do not trust – remember this if you’re having difficulties trying to connect with someone.
Actively Listen
Basic gestures, such as listening, go a long way with others and how you make them feel. Give full attention when the other person is speaking, especially if it’s an intimate conversation. Remember to validate the other person’s experience and show empathy.
The goal is to actively listen and without judgment – in doing so will show the other person you care, and that’s crucial for developing intimacy.
Try not to think while others are still talking.
This is very difficult for most individuals. Many times, we find ourselves thinking about what we are going to say next before the other person is even done talking! It is ok to pause and process before responding to somebody – they will probably respect your ability to listen, think, and then respond, but most importantly, they will feel heard.
Is there someone you’ve been wanting to get to know better? Ask them about themselves and be sure to actively listen to what they say. This is another tip to show the other person that they are important to you and facilitate the actions it takes to increase the intimacy within the relationship.

No-Touch Physical Intimacy
When people think of intimacy, they assume sex or at least some form of touching. Thankfully, this is not always the case. Remember: intimacy can be within all relationships, not specifically sexual or romantic ones. To promote intimacy within all of your close relationships, here are some No-Touch forms of intimacy:
Do Things Together
Common interests and shared activities can be a highlight of many relationships, especially amongst people you may not be emotionally close with. For those who value quality time in a relationship, having activities, hobbies, or interests to do together allows intimacy to flourish. Sharing space and time while doing an activity that brings comfort and joy can be incredibly fulfilling and intimate.
Doing something together, like cooking, hiking, or playing a game are ways that you can be physically intimate with others, without even having to touch!
Some of the best times are when you are surrounded by others. It can be a gathering of people or a one-on-one experience. Don’t limit your “Night Outs” to exclusively with your significant other – there are so many other people who want to go out and have a good time with you, too!

Intellectual Intimacy
Intellectual intimacy can even be found among people you may not necessarily feel close with, such as coworkers or acquaintances. If you have ever solved a problem with another person at work, this is a form of intellectual intimacy.
Intellectual intimacy can be fulfilling and can allow individuals to exchange ideas, concepts, and thoughts with others. Intellectual intimacy is great for those who enjoy mentally stimulating conversations with others.
If you know someone who loves to read books, try reading together – that could be in the same space or even the same book. Find topics that interest you and find others to talk about them with – intellectual intimacy can be just as simple as that!
Travel Together
Many people believe that traveling can increase your intelligence – try traveling with someone you’d like to learn more about! Explore new places and create shared memories in other locations. You may be surprised how much you can learn about a person by traveling with them; this is what intimacy is all about.
Learn Something New with Others
The act of learning something new allows for an opportunity to expand yourself; if done with others, this enables a greater opportunity for intimacy. Try taking a class that involves interactions with others. Discover a social hobby or team sport to meet others, work with others, and work towards increasing your intimacy with those you care about.
Try something new! Do you know someone else who wants to try the same new activity as you? Try it together! You may create a special bond with that person; if not, you still get to have fun and learn a new activity.
Healthy Debates
The ability to have a healthy debate with others is a prime example of intellectual intimacy. Healthy debates are a way to communicate and share your feelings, opinions, and thoughts. A healthy debate involves being attentive to the other person, listening (as mentioned above), and respectfully challenging each other’s viewpoints.
Express what you like and don’t like – you may realize you have more in common than you think! But don’t fret if you recognize differences, that’s what makes us unique individuals. No two people are exactly the same.

Practical Intimacy
Practical intimacy involves asking yourself the question “What can I do for them?”. Practical intimacy involves listening to their cues (have they recently mentioned they could use help with something?) and initiating thoughtful action. These are selfless gestures that would make the life of the other person better, even in a minor way:
Support Another
Support comes in many forms and can be accomplished in many different ways. Examples of supporting one another would be to be there when needed (emotional support), provide advice (informational support), or be there as a friend (social support). All of these forms of support enable intimacy within a relationship.
Acts of Service
One of the love languages is Acts of Service – this is the act of helping another person with tangible support. To help another person by assisting with Acts of Service is an intimate way of completing a thoughtful act in hopes of making the other person’s life easier or better in some way.
Learn their Love Language
Did You Know: Love languages can apply to other relationships besides your partner! Try learning about others’ love languages and how you might apply that to your relationship.
For example, if your friend’s love language is quality time, try to be more intentional about planning uninterrupted time together. People tend to notice when you recognize their love language and further act upon it.
If you are in a romantic relationship, this article gives a greater insight into love languages:
Be intimate with yourself
Intimacy also includes yourself. You may find it to be difficult to be intimate with others if you struggle to be intimate with yourself. Try some of these tips to increase your own intimacy within yourself:
Self-compassion
Practicing self-compassion is to find love within yourself. Think about how loving yourself makes you feel – do you feel comfortable in those thoughts? Do you forgive yourself when you make a mistake? Self-compassion is a mindset and one we should all try to strive for.
Positive self-talk
Listen to how you talk to yourself; that inner voice in your head, what do they say? Is it positive? Positive self-talk enables greater confidence and self-esteem within yourself – these tools allow the opportunity to have healthy intimacy with others and within yourself.
Body positivity
When you look in the mirror, are you self-compassionate and provide yourself with positive self-talk? Body positivity affects people of all ages, genders, and personalities and becomes a full-circle moment with intimacy found amongst ourselves.

Why It Matters
There are many forms of intimacy, each providing its own ability to grow relationships of all types. Intimacy fosters a sense of safety, connection, and belonging. Prioritizing these forms of closeness can provide emotional nourishment and strengthen relationships of all forms. Prioritizing intimacy within ourselves is also shown to increase our ability to be intimate with others.